Just across the room tucked behind the cabinet door
Is a child in a woman’s body snorting lines from off the floor. She never thought that she would be here, in this place of no return. In her mind she’s in a pick up truck sporting a southern summers burn. The windows rolled down around her, the smell of fresh cut grass. She was once a happy, simple girl before life kicked her ass. Too many wrong decisions, mixed with too few apologies. Her temper got the best of her, and now she just can’t believe That she’s about to lose the last thing in this world she thought was hers. A date, a dress, and one brave man asking for a heart she never returned. Her phone is on the counter. It keeps lighting up the night. The eerie glow washing over her is the only thing that’s bright. “I am getting married.” Was the last thing that she read. Before her knees hit the cold, tile floor. She couldn’t make it to the bed. She grabbed the baggie off the table so she wouldn’t have to feel The pounding in her chest. The proof that this is real. In a different time she loved her. In another world they made it work. Two kids in the backyard, with a dog, and love that didn’t hurt. But in this life the things she did spoke louder than her words. The holes in the bathroom wall. The money that wasn’t hers. You can mend what’s broken, but you can’t fix what’s not yours. Now that heart belongs to someone else, and she says that she’s sure. He’s the one she wants to be with. He gives her everything. A life she could only imagine. A shiny wedding ring. The city lights, and promises were too much to turn away. She borrowed more time from the present than their future cared to pay. And now she’s counting on one hand the moments she really tried To show her that she loved her. She remembers their last goodbye. Under an oak in Alabama, she gently caressed her hair. “I’m coming back for you one day. You can trust me. I swear.” She kissed her lips like tangerines, sweet-sour to the taste. Her love knew the words were a bitter lie, but then she wouldn’t say. Now there’s no room for her in Huntsville, and her heart is caving in. The beat of it is racing, and the driver never wins. Her eyes close gently as a lonely tear rolls off her cheek. She can love the thought of her tonight until “I do” is said next week.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Tennessee Martin
|